When my son was in his senior year at BYU, he struggled to figure out what profession to pursue after graduation. He majored in political science, but he didn’t want to go to law school. He briefly toyed with the idea of working for one of the major consulting firms, but after several interviews and visits to various firms, he didn’t feel right about this path. One evening in January during his last semester at BYU, he went to see the movie Just Mercy. I had no idea that a movie would impact his life so greatly.
After seeing this movie, our son came to me and my husband and announced that he wanted to apply for the Teach for America program. We’d never heard of Teach for America. Our son explained that it’s a program that places college graduates in inner-city schools, where they teach for two years, sometimes three years if they decide to stay for an extra year. The film Just Mercy inspired my son to want to understand disadvantaged populations and poverty in the U.S., and he felt that participating in Teach for America would help him achieve this goal. After spending two years teaching, he planned to go to graduate school and pursue a masters in foreign policy.
I will admit that our initial reaction was not favorable. I liked the idea of him going to graduate school, but Teach for America sounded like a hare-brained idea to me. Why didn’t he want a nice consulting job? Where would he end up, and since he was still single, who would he date? I pictured him teaching in a dangerous high school in Detroit, where he would encounter knives, guns, belligerent and unruly students, and metal detectors. He had always been idealistic, and this seemed like an unwise plan, to say the least. I worried about him being lonely in a big city, not having a support system, languishing away in an unfulfilling job. I worried about his church activity and who he would date and whether he’d get married. And, depending on where he ended up, would we ever see him?
To make matters worse, a friend of mine who used to be a schoolteacher told me horror stories about kids who had participated in Teach for America. One person had a nervous breakdown. Another couldn’t take the program and dropped out and got divorced. I lay awake at night in a cold sweat, envisioning every worst-case scenario.
I was struggling with an anxiety disorder at the time, and I went to see a therapist and sobbed out all my worries and fears for my son. I went to the temple and cried to the Lord in the celestial room, confiding all my fears. I begged the Lord to have a hand in my son’s life, to direct his paths, to help him end up where he was supposed to be. I reminded the Lord that He knew my son, that He knew what his future should be, that He had the power to place my son where he would thrive. But over the next several months I continued to worry and fret and wish my son were choosing a different career path.
In June of that year my son received his teaching assignment. Imagine my relief when he was assigned to teach second grade in a charter school in Phoenix. My fears of unruly high school students and metal detectors faded. He would be close enough to us to fly home on holidays and school vacations. And he would be able to attend a young adult ward in Phoenix. I uttered many prayers of gratitude.
Turns out that the Lord had a much better plan for my son than I did. My son ended up teaching second grade for three years. His teaching experience was difficult but rewarding, and he learned so much about disadvantaged populations in the process, just as he had predicted. We saw him during all his school breaks and holidays, and he came home during the summers, so we ended up seeing him much more than we would have if he’d taken a consulting job in another city. He had good roommates. This past year he was called to be a counselor in his single adult ward’s bishopric, and we watched him grow spiritually through this calling.
During his last year of teaching, my son applied to graduate school. He applied to various second-tier schools, but then he decided to apply to his dream schools—Georgetown, Princeton, Harvard. He thought these schools were a longshot, but he figured it didn’t hurt to try. Imagine our surprise and delight when he was accepted to all seven schools he applied to, including Harvard. Seems that doing Teach for America looks great on a resume. He decided to go to Princeton, which gave him a full-ride scholarship plus a generous living stipend.
And what of dating? He didn’t find anyone to date in Phoenix, but he dated various girls that he met on dating apps when he was home for the summer and during school breaks. Once again, I fretted over his future as he grew older with no marriage prospects. But then last summer he met a delightful girl who lived not far from our town. They went on a couple of dates, then dated long-distance when he went back to Phoenix to teach. Last May they got engaged, and they were married in the Payson Temple in August, just in time for my son to start his graduate program at Princeton. My son and his new bride love Princeton and their new apartment and ward. They already have callings, and they send us videos of their fun adventures. To say that my son is thriving is an understatement. All my fears and worries three years ago were for naught. I have learned—and am continuing to learn—to entrust my emerging adult children’s lives to the Lord, to trust that He knows them, loves them, and will direct their paths.
Your thoughts?
How have you seen the hand of the Lord in your life or the lives of those you love? What has increased your faith and trust in God’s care and timing?